Why did the girl fall off the swing?
Because she had no arms!


Why did the girl fall off the edge of the Grand Canyon?
Because she had no eyes.


Why did the man fall of his bike?
Because someone threw a fridge at him!


An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman were sitting in a pub one day talking about their sons.

"My son was born on St George's day" said the Englishman, "so obviously we decided to call him George".

"Well thats funny, my son was born on St Andrew's day" remarked the Scotsman, "so we called him Andrew".

"What an incredible coincidence!" said the Irishman, "That's exactly what happened with our son Pancake!".


In a train car there were a Canadian, an American, a spectacular looking blonde and a frightfully awful looking fat lady. After several minutes of the trip the train happens to pass through a dark tunnel, and the unmistakable sound of a slap is heard. When they leave the tunnel, the American had a big red slap mark on his cheek.

The blonde thought - "That American son of a bitch wanted to touch me and by mistake, he must have put his hand on the fat lady, who in turn must have slapped his face."

The fat lady thought - "This dirty old American laid his hands on the blonde and she smacked him."

The American thought - "That bastard Canadian put his hand on that blonde and by mistake she slapped me."

The Canadian thought - "I hope there's another tunnel soon so I can smack that stupid American again."